Its officially denied

I spoke with my neurologists office today and the insurance is still denying the request for surgery. I was also told none of the other insurance companies are approving the implants. My neurologist has even stopped seeing patients regarding it because no one can get it approved. I will be seeing my pain management doctor later this week to try to figure out what to do now. I feel so lost. I don't know where to go from here. Before the implant my doctors were out of things to try. I am now to the point I get the headaches every day, its just a matter of how bad. If they don't start out strong I can take meds every 4-6 hours to try to keep the pain under control. This means taking 5-6 pain pills and 4-5 muscle relaxers per day. On the bad days I can take four of each at one time and still not get the pain to go away. The injections aren't working anymore so we are stopping that. It was to the point I was in a lot of pain for about three days after the injections and wasn't getting much relief at all. I can't keep taking all these pills everyday. I can't live like this much longer. I have already been doing this for almost a year. There is no telling how much damage I have done to my body with all the drugs I have been putting in it. Anyway, my hope for a end to this pain was denied, my pain comes everyday and I have missed a ton of work. I'm scared I will lose a job I love, become addicted to the pain killers and have a life that is controlled by pain. I am missing out on so many things because of this crap. I just wanted my life back, to be pain free again.

Today is also the one year anniversary of my friend that was killed in a car accident. This past May she would have graduated and become a vet from A&M. She had also just gotten engaged the weekend of the accident to her high school sweetheart. She was an amazing person who had the ability to make life brighter. She always touched the lives of those she met.

Throw in that Mark is still sick and you have a great day. He will be going to the doctor for the second time tomorrow for this crap. Poor thing keeps coughing and it all just keeps settling in his chest.

I hope you are all having a better week. Steph, if you have any new pictures of Kaia to post it would be greatly appreciated. We also still have the kitten to find a home for. We are trying to come up with a name for her. Any real suggestions? Not the smart ass kind please. Here's another picture of her to help.